Strycher – Gen X in 2K

Watch a group of animals sometime. Cesar Millan is always talking about the pack leader. We have a term/phrase for it, we call it the "alpha male", though it is not always a male that is the alpha in a pack.  Sometimes we just call it the "alpha dog", and we even tolerated the creation of a movie about alpha tendencies.  In any pack, only one alpha can preside, and animals understand this.  In my house, the "alpha" is actually a Siamese cat, the pack leader over all the other cats and dogs.  Yes, the dogs submit to my alpha cat's dominant lead, and he is dubbed "king of the house".  This is, of course, if you accept that the animal pack has an animal "alpha" and that a human, i.e. me, is not the true "alpha" of the household.  Probably not, I let my Siamese walk all over me.

Surprisingly enough, humans seem unable to grasp the alpha mentality in groups of humans.  We also have a term for it in human behavior, calling it Type A personality. In any group of humans, there is a potential to have not just one, but several Type As in the group, depending on how diverse the group population is.  However, the Type As have a certain myopia about their own Type A alpha tendencies, and regularly fail to recognize that any group will rapidly become dysfunctional if the true "alpha" is not identified and acknowledged.

What I see happen, and am guilty of myself, is when more than one alpha types are present in a group, each seeks to solidify his or her dominance over the group and the discussion. The longer it takes to solidify that dominance, the more likely the group is to break up into factions and arguments. I, myself, am guilty of losing my cool and making some pretty sharp statements to others, though my ability to deal with these situations has improved over time. This is a type of destructive conflict, and can, over time, result in a permanent division within the group — not what you ideally want in a business setting.

You might be wondering though, are all alphas outspoken and vocal? In my experience, the answer is no.  However, the quiet ones can sow just as much dissent, though it is usually behind the scenes.  Sometimes an alpha can be the least vocal person in the group, and you may not even notice their behaviors for quite some time. This type of alpha can be harder to deal with than the vocal one, because he or she is so hard to detect at times.

As I have considered this topic, I have wondered why it is that humans struggle to understand this natural personality tendency. What I believe is that we are aware of the behaviors and tendencies, but our conflict resolution skills are so poorly developed that when an alpha fight initiates, we do not know how to diffuse the conflict.  Animals resolve the alpha dispute over time as one alpha wins fight after fight, sometimes with one combatant being severely injured, killed, or forced to leave the pack. In human groups, we do not allow a conflict to degrade to that level in business, which just extends the life of the fight, sometimes across many years.

How, as leaders, can we handle this tendency better then? The first step is always detection and awareness. If we do not notice that this behavior is arising, we cannot take actions to diffuse it before the fight explodes. After detecting, we need to develop and practice skills at bringing the alphas together to establish a productive working relationship, with constructive, not destructive, conflict. This skill is not easily obtained, and is often dependent upon the leader's charisma and earned respect. Each leader I have studied has his or her own way of addressing these situations, but inevitably they all involve bringing the two alphas together to bridge the gap via discussion. Once the alphas bridge the gap in their disagreement and establish a working relationship, the combination can often be a very powerful component of a functioning team. Of course, sometimes this conversation also helps work out in a more peaceable means the true alpha, with one submitting to the other to some degree. Regardless of the mechanics, the end result should be a peaceful agreement between the alpha personalities that enables productive participation in the group.